Cancer Update - September 2003

GOOD NEWS!!!
My last CT scan came back completely clear this week, that makes TWO clear CT scans, which means I'm officially IN REMISSION!! For the layman, that means that the cancer is gone. Provided it STAYS gone for five years, then they'll tell me I'm cured. Can you imagine? Cured of cancer. It boggles the mind. I never really had any doubts, since they gave me such a good prognosis in the beginning, but what a trial to have to go through. Blech.
I'm scheduled for a PET scan on October 17th, which is additional insurance that it's all gone, but my oncologist is confident that it will be, since my response to the treatment was so excellent from the get-go. The PET technology is very new to Anchorage - it's only been here for a few months. Providence will have the second one in town available soon, but they're not up and running quite yet. For those of you not familiar with it, it's amazing. A CT scan shows anatomy…a PET scan show activity. In other words, a CT scan will show tumors, a PET scan will show individual cancer cells running around (if there are any, which there won't be, because, did I mention that it's all gone? Well, it is).
Anyway, provided the PET scan is all clear, too, then I can have the surgery to get this blasted port out of my chest, then it's just periodic CT scans for the next five years to make sure it doesn't come back. At the end of five years, I'm done. Dr. Stewart will say, "Go - get out of here and live happily ever after. I don't ever want to see you again unless you find another lump somewhere." Which won't happen. Because I'm not going through this again. Because it's gone. And I'm not letting it come back. Ever.
Needless to say, I'm ecstatic. So is my family. My last treatment was on September 17th. The last few were getting rougher. It was taking longer and longer to recover. But I've managed to make it through with my hair intact and no funky things happening to my fingernails or anything else. Very minimal side effects. I'm convinced the enzymes were a big help and all the prayers and thoughtfulness of all of you an even bigger help. It's pretty easy to keep a good attitude when somebody is telling you every day how much they love you and care about you. Thank you all so much for all the support. Each one of you gave in your own special ways and my family and I appreciated every single gesture. What wonderful friends and loved ones we have. I hope you all know how much we appreciate you and love you in return.
Over the last few months, many of you have asked me two basic questions that I've had to put some thought into and I promised I would answer them in this forum. The first question I heard most often is, "Have you made any drastic changes in your life as a result of this?" The answer is no. A trial like this would cause anyone to pause and take stock in their life, and I'm no different. When I did my assessment, I concluded that I'm very happy with my station in life. My relationships with loved ones are good, I'm happy with my level of education, my family life, my spiritual life, my career, my hobbies, everything. The only minor change we've made as a whole family is in our diet. We're trying to eat more organic foods - the freshest, rawest, highest quality food we can find. Other than that, I have nothing to report, and I'm proud of that.
The second question I've been asked a lot is, "Have you learned anything from this?" Well, quite literally, I've learned a lot more about cancer than I ever wanted to know. Beyond that, I've also learned that there are a whole lot more people that care about us than I ever knew about. I think this is probably the case with most people. It's unfortunate that that we have to go through challenges like this to learn that lesson, though. This is going to sound very cliché, but I have found a lot of meaning in this, too: Just because somebody doesn't love you exactly the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all that they have. I've learned to accept whatever people want to give, in whatever manner they want to give it, and to appreciate the gift for exactly what it is. Sometimes it's hard to accept and love somebody just the way that they are, and not judge anything about them, but if you can do this, your relationships with people will be much, much closer. I've also learned that everything happens for a reason. God is in complete control. We live in a fallen world and sometimes the horrible events in our lives are a result of that, but nothing happens except by permission from God. This lesson really tested my faith and I had to explore it a great deal to come to that conclusion, but I'm confident it's right. There's a great deal of peace that comes with a greater understanding of the sovereignty of God. Thank you to Rich, for sparking that interest in my spirit - I'm not done with the journey, but I've learned a lot so far!
The most difficult thing has been to put life on hold for six months, especially for a Type A like me. I'm so looking forward to celebrating the holidays this year. Jacquelyn is a year old now and at such a fun age. I'm going to pull Jaden out of pre-school after October and just play with my girls all winter. Jaden will be in Kindergarten next fall and I will get started on building us a bigger house, but until then, I'm going to savor every moment I can with them and make a whole bunch of precious, blessed memories.
Just wanted to share the good news and get those questions answered for you. I probably won't send out any more updates since it's essentially over. Unless there's some bad news after the PET scan or surgery, but I'm confident there won't be. My next correspondence will likely be our annual Christmas letter.
Again, thanks to every one of you for the prayers and thoughts. They worked!! Praise God!!
Much love,
Tiffany
P.S. A shallow, vain little sidenote for the ladies: Revlon Colorstay nail polish. I saw a short clip on the Today show how the chemists at Revlon studied vehicle paint to come up with this formula. I've had one application on for 10 days and counting, two trips to the pool, numerous dishwashings, house scrubbings, kid's baths and my own showers, and not one nick, peel or fading of color. Not even a dull on the shine. Trust me. Buy it.